Ngozi Edema 032

When Life Doesn’t Go As Planned: Why Self-Compassion is Your Secret Productivity Tool

Let’s talk about those days when everything goes sideways. And this week is one of those for me. And I was completely paralyzed. I just did not want to do anything!

You had your planner filled out, your to-do list color-coded, and your day perfectly mapped. And then—life happens.  Your energy crashes. Suddenly, the day you had all mapped out turns into a swirl of unfinished tasks and unmet expectations.

If you’re like me, your first instinct might be to push harder. Power through. Beat yourself up just a little for falling behind.

But I’ve learned something over the years—not just as a mom and entrepreneur, but as a human being with dreams and limits: productivity alone doesn’t cut it if we’re still harsh inside.
What we need is something deeper, more healing, and far more sustainable: self-compassion.

So, What Is Self-Compassion in Productivity?

Self-compassion means giving yourself the same kindness and understanding you’d give a close friend when things don’t go as planned. In the context of productivity, it looks like:

  • Speaking kindly to yourself when you fall short
  • Allowing yourself to pause without guilt
  • Letting go of the idea that success = constant output
  • Accepting that rest is a productive act too

It’s not about making excuses. It’s about building resilience by refusing to bully yourself into burnout.

When My Plans Fell Apart—Am I Failling?

Let me take you behind the scenes for a moment.

A few weeks ago, I was juggling several deadlines. My calendar was bursting. And just when I thought I had a grip on everything, I had a house renovations and I don't do well with disruptions. So, everything fell apart. And negative fellings came in. And I knew I had to get out of my discouragement as soon as possible.

I was exhausted, emotionally spent, and convinced I was failling at everything which is not true! In that moment, I realized I needed some self-compassion. And this is what I do when that happens:

  1. Pause with Purpose: Before spiraling into stress, hit pause. Take a breath. Ask yourself: What’s one thing I can still do today that supports my peace and my priorities? Even if it’s just drinking water, sending a check-in email, or clearing one corner of your desk—small wins stack up.
  2. Protect a Pocket of Time: Even if the whole day feels like a wash, carve out 10–15 minutes just for you. That focused time can be a quiet moment of journaling, a short walk, or planning for tomorrow. You’re not doing it to catch up—you’re doing it to come back to yourself.
  3.  Speak Kindly—Out Loud if You Have To

We’ve got to interrupt that inner critic. Say something like:

“I’m doing the best I can with what I have, and that’s enough today.”

Speaking it aloud rewires your brain and brings calm to your nervous system. Self-compassion is like a soft place to land when everything feels hard.

Why Self-Compassion Makes You More Productive 

A lot of people resist self-compassion because they think it will make them lazy or unmotivated. But research—and real life—say otherwise.

When you treat yourself with kindness, you’re more likely to bounce back from setbacks. You make fewer fear-based decisions. You stop wasting energy beating yourself up and instead redirect that energy toward progress.

Self-compassion is what helps you stay in the game longer. It helps you show up creatively, courageously, and consistently. It doesn't lower your standards—it lifts your capacity to meet them without losing yourself in the process.

This Is Especially True If You’re a Busy Mom or Multi-Passionate Entrepreneur

If you’re anything like me, your life isn’t lived in neat little boxes. You’re raising humans, building dreams, handling life admin, maybe even writing books or running a business—all at the same time.

Your time is valuable. Your energy is limited. And the best thing you can do to sustain your momentum is learn how to recover without shame.

Because real productivity isn’t about doing more. It’s about doing what matters—and having the self-compassion to know that you matter too. If you take care of You, you can take care of all other things.

Final Thoughts: You Are Not Behind. You Are Becoming.

So if today didn’t go to plan—if this week already feels off track—I want you to know something:

You're not failing. You're learning. You're growing. You're human.

And that’s more than okay—it’s beautiful.

Let’s normalize success that’s fueled by self-compassion, not burnout. Let’s build rhythms that make room for recovery. Let’s rewrite what productivity really means, especially for women with full lives and big visions.

And if you are new here, thanks for stopping by. I help busy authors and entrepreneurs create time for what truly matters. I strongly recommend  time-blocking. To get you started with time blocking, grab your guide below:https://timeblockingmasterytakecontrolofyourtimeandgetmoredone-mc0.plannerpack.co

Join my newsletter for a weekly doze of motivation to help you reclaim time to do the things that matter:https://mailchi.mp/ngoziedema.com/personal-time-audit-discover-hidden-time-wasters-and-reclaim-your-day

Get copies of my books: https://www.amazon.com/shop/africanfoodsdotcom/list/121PPT4JMU0Y5?ref_=aipsflistWork with me: https://www.ngoziedema.com/work_with_me.html

You will find the best stuff on the blog! Check out the following:

Like this post? Share it!


Fresh-squeezed how-to tips on book writing and busy mom life delivered to your inbox weekly.

My mama taught me never to brag. But permit me just this once to brag. Our emails kind of rock. This is where all the magic happens. Sign up for regular pep talks, inspiration, and all kinds of substance-packed goodness. Let's connect before you say goodbye.